I got accepted to college today!

I am having an incredibly bad day, and I got a very normal sized envelope in the mail today from the local college I have applied to. Now, the first time I applied to college, I was 17, and it was 2001. When you got accepted, you got one of those big, giant envelopes, so they didn't have to fold your acceptance letter, and you could frame it, or something. If you were rejected, you got a normal sized envelope, with a single sheet inside. (I think. I knew better then to apply to some place that was going to reject me.) So, when I got that regular sized envelope today, on a bad day, my insides almost fell out. Turns out, colleges are just greener these days, and trying to streamline as much of the process online. I'm in!

In the process, I got thinking about how the hell I'm going to handle my life, and school, and the pressure on women to 'have it all'. First of all, I hate that term. To me, 'have it all' just implies the pressure to do it all. You too can work outside the home! And raise perfectly beautiful, well behaved children! And have an immaculate spotless home! And an incredibly intimate relationship with your partner, complete with a lingerie wearing sex life! (/end sarcasm)

Somewhere, something is going to be sacrificed in my pursuit of higher education. Knowing me, the first thing to go will most likely be that whole spotless house thing. If that bugs anyone in my house, they'll have to pick up the slack.

I've had many, many conversations with Casey as to what our lives are going to look like with me in school. I'm going to try to schedule as much of my class time during the day as possible. Family time in the evening is really important to me, so I want to try to be home for the whole dinner, bath and bed routine that we have established. Casey is aware that I won't be available as much in the evening, but he's pretty ok with that, as he often works on his own thing in the evening.

There are times I'm going to be stressed. There are times I'm going to be tired. Those are things that are typically not acceptable for women to be. The superwoman ideal is strongly ingrained in me. This time, I am going to remember that it's ok to ask for help, either in school, or with stuff at home. Someone remind me of that, ok?